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Post #2: "things I am thinking about and have some relation to each other but mostly are just m

  • erinosment
  • Apr 14, 2016
  • 6 min read

Blog post #2- time to get rolling! I sat down this morning telling myself I was going to get to work on my #oisellefullhalf goal of writing 13 blog posts this month, so here goes.

Reflecting on the past few weeks of training, deciding to get off the track for a little while, and work on refocusing and finding joy in the process, I was struck by how many times I have had to work at finding meaning in the little things. It's been difficult on occasion to remind myself that even mundane occurrences can be transformed into valuable experiences. All this takes is a little positive thinking and reframing effort - easier said than done, but a practice I continue to work at cultivating each day.

I wanted to share a couple of things today- one, a story from March which I continue to think back on and take heart in; and another, a great TED talk shared with me yesterday which I think speaks to a lot of feelings I've been experiencing lately.

First, I had mentioned in an earlier post racing at Raleigh Relays near the end of March. While it was an awesome opportunity to race a fast 5k with one of my teammates, Andie Cozzarelli, and get together with the NC Volee flock, the race itself didn't go great. This prompted me to decide to take a step back to basics and get into the heart of training, and get away from torturing myself with negative thoughts about why I wasn't hitting certain paces or times.

After that race, I was walking across the field at the NC State track feeling disheartened and angry. I knew it was not my best effort but felt stuck in a rut, and raging away at how to get out of it. As I was reaching to change out of my spikes, another coach came up to me and starting speaking. It was Esther Atkins (pro runner for @SkechersGO and assistant coach at Appalachian State- and complete boss, more importantly!). She told me to not be discouraged by the race. It's all a part of the marathon recovery, she said- even telling me of her own comeback after marathon number 1, when she ran a fast road 5k and then felt the burn after that.

At that particular moment, that was EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I cannot even begin to tell you how much gratitude I felt for her coming over to speak to me- that alone was incredible encouraging. I am very much amazed that she even knew who I was (part of me fighting back negativity is not allowing my thoughts to relegate my own status to 'a nobody' but instead change that to 'emerging elite'). It spoke volumes that she was willing to offer me some advice and encouragement, and that turned my entire night around. I was in awe of her race at the Marathon Trials, and the conversation at Raleigh was really invaluable. So, Esther, if you end up reading this blog- thank you!

This experience also left me thinking on having a mentor or role model in our sport, and what it can mean to younger athletes to have older, elite, championship-winning runners inspire and encourage them. In no other sport can you find a playing field where emerging elites have the same opportunities as veterans- all defined by times, standards, etc. Along with that, running is a sport where you can find some of the most humble people winning because they work hard. A conversation like the one Esther had with me helped me to realize when I needed to back off pushing too hard, and her words gave me a new perspective on training. It's a great reminder of how athletes can support each other and be role models for each other, and a role that I want to be able to fill for other women who are training to become professionals as well. I have been encouraged and inspired by the other women who compete for Oiselle, including so many Haute Volee ladies who reached out to me to offer advice about the marathon and training, that this really hit home for me. It's incredible to be a part of such a supportive team and family.

Also- check out this awesome video of the Trials Oiselle happenings- can't think of a better way to show how this team really is a huge family!

* * *

I also wanted to share some excerpts from a TED talk shared with me yesterday by Sal. It's a little lengthy, but I think it reflects an important message to remain level-headed in every aspect- remaining positive, and avoiding blowing negative thoughts out of proportion (sensing a theme for me here, anyone?)

Here's a good quote from one of his talks, "The Surprising Science of Happiness":

"When our fears are bounded,we're prudent, we're cautious, we're thoughtful. When our fears are unbounded and overblown, we're reckless, and we're cowardly."

This excerpt is similar, and comes from the blog WaitButWhy by Tim Urban, titled "Life is a Picture, but You Live in a Pixel."

"Jack’s struggle isn’t unusual—it’s something most of us are going through in one way or another. In his amazing Ted Talk, Harvard professor Dan Gilbert describes what he calls The Impact Bias—our “tendency to overestimate the hedonic impact of future events.” Humans have the ability to simulate future situations in our heads to predict what it’ll be like to experience them, but that simulator doesn’t always work so well and tends “to make you believe that different outcomes are more different than in fact they really are.”

Gilbert says that “from field studies to laboratory studies, we see that winning or losing an election, gaining or losing a romantic partner, getting or not getting a promotion, passing or not passing a college test, and on and on, have far less impact, less intensity, and much less duration than people expect them to have.” It even applies to terrible events in our lives. According to Gilbert, “a recent study showing how major life traumas affect people suggests that if it happened over three months ago, with only a few exceptions, it has no impact whatsoever on your happiness.” Jack is clearly a victim of The Impact Bias.

Jack’s difficulties also relate to The Pixel Theory, a phrase coined by Tim Urban during his famous “alone in his apartment in front of the mirror” Ted Talk.

Jack sees his life as a rich picture depicting an epic story and assumes that the key to his happiness lies in the broad components of the image.

But this is a mistake, because Jack doesn’t live in the picture’s broad strokes, he lives at all times in a single pixel of the image—a single Today.

So while thousands of Jack’s Todays will, to an outsider from far away, begin to look like a complete picture, Jack spends each moment of his actual reality in one unremarkable Today pixel or another. Jack’s error is brushing off his mundane Wednesday and focusing entirely on the big picture, when in fact the mundane Wednesday is the experience of his actual life.

And his assumption that his future Todays would be as vibrant and rich as the broad picture of his life is misunderstanding the unremarkable nature of a pixel, no matter what one’s life looks like in broad strokes. This assumption leads Jack to feel like his uneventful Today must be an unsatisfactory temporary relationship, when in reality it’s an inevitable and permanent marriage that he must accept and embrace in order to be happy.

As far as what will actually make Jack happier as he lives in his mundane Wednesday, there are a number of scientifically proven things, including spending time with people you like, sleeping well and exercising, doing things you’re good at, and doing kind things for others.

But perhaps the first thing Jack needs to do is learn to feel more gratitude, another scientifically proven route to happiness and the area in which he falls the most woefully short. Jack spends so much of his time looking up at the great things that will come his way and planning his future happiness and not nearly enough time looking down and thinking about how badly he used to want so many of the things he currently has.

Currently, I am working on embracing my 'mundane' Today by recognizing my gratitude for the ability to get to do what I love, run, be healthy, be with the ones I love. By focusing on the little picture, I know it will be easier to reach big picture goals and be smiling along the way.

Extra cheese- April showers bring May flowers. But seriously, they always do. Including my new flowerpot!! (Hurray, plant life!)

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